Groundbreaking contributions?

Breakthroughs of which I am most proud:

1. Armstrong, E.  Colonel Mustard in the Aviary with the Candlestick: a limit cycle attractor transitions to a stable focus via supercritical Andronov-Hopf bifurcation., 2018 April 1; PDF

2. Armstrong, E. A Neural Networks Approach to Predicting How Things Might Have Turned Out Had I Mustered the Nerve to Ask Barry Cottonfield to the Junior Prom Back in 1997., 2017 April 1; PDF

3. Armstrong, E. Pipe-cleaner Model of Neuronal Network Dynamics. https://arXiv:1603:09723, 2016 April 1; PDF

4. Armstrong, E. Non-detection of the Tooth Fairy at Optical Wavelengths, 2012 April 1; Journal of Irreproducible Results 52, 3: 22-25, 2014; PDF


And here are suggested qualifying exam questions for physics graduate students at UC San Diego, which I wrote while studying for my own.